Sunday, January 29, 2006

Quotations in Context

are no fun. But when you take them out of context they can be a riot. That's why it pays for parents to watch kid's shows from a different perspective. A case in point, one of my favorite kid's shows:

See Bear in the Big Blue House -

"What's that smell? (sniff) Ooh, I know that smell." [Bear]
"I gotta pee! –Me, too! –Really? –Yeah! –We'll be right back, Bear." – [Pip and Pop]
"Yeah, I tried pushing it in and shoving it in. It just won't go in my mousehole." – [Tutter]
"I was just about to look at some dirt. Oh, cool! Hey, do you wanna look?" – [Bear]
"Ooh! I like it!" - [Pip and Pop]
"He was busy measuring things to see if they fit into his mousehole." - [Bear]
"Don't ask me why. It's a bear thing." - [Bear]
"Oh, don't sell yourself short, Bear. Although, I don't suppose you could ever do that. You're too big." - [Luna]
"And I know just where to find him… To the bedroom!" - [Tutter Mouse]
"Bears like boxes, too, only it's hard to find one big enough." - [Bear]
"Of all the evenings during the year that I rise, this is my favorite. -Really? -Oh, there's just something about the air on Christmas Eve." - [Luna and Bear]
"Ooh, I know that smell." - [Bear]
"Let's see what pictures I can take. in my bedroom." - [Bear]
"Tell me, why do you love the bed so much?" - [Bear]
"Coming, Bear! Bear, I'm coming! (grunting)" - [Tutter]
"Sometimes I'm a forgetful bear." - [Bear]
"What shape is that under the covers? It doesn't look like a box." - [Bear]
"(sniff) Ooh! You have that just-rolled-out-of-bed smell." - [Bear]
"Is everything o.k. in there?" - [Bear]
"(snuffling) Hey, what's that smell?" - [Bear]
"What are you two doing in here? -We're having fun in the bathtub! -Yeah!" - [Bear, Pip, and Pop]
"There isn't an animal who works harder this time of year than reindeer." - [Bear]
"(sniff) Ooh! You smell like you're ready to play today." - [Bear]
"The way you're doing it is wrong, wrong, wrong!" - [Tutter]
"Oh, never mind." - [Pip]
"Great gobs of gorgonzola!" - [Tutter]
"There it is, Bear! Oh, here, let me lick it. (smacks lips) (slurp)" - [Tutter]
"What's wrong, Tutter? -Oh, it's too big, Bear. Too big! (grunting)" - [Bear and Tutter]
"No! There's so much other stuff to do in the bathroom! -Yeah!" - [Pip and Pop]
". . .And we helped! (laughter)" - [Pip and Pop]
"You know, you can look at it if you want. -(gasp) Really? Thanks! -You can look at it, too, Bear. -Oh, thanks!" - [Ojo, Pip & Pop, and Bear]
"Hey, look at that little mouse in red! He must really like to get attention!" - [Tutter]
"Everybody and every creature has to poop sometimes." - [Bear]
"You mean we have to wait?!" - [Pip and Pop]